The Greats

Children get a lot of attention. They demand it, in fact. It's understandable since they're pretty darn helpless and pretty darn cute...most of the time. In this day and age, we plaster our kids' mugs all over Facebook, feature them in photo books, home videos, and, yes, blogs. But when people age, sometimes that limelight fades away. Their worlds simply become a whole lot smaller and slower, and their voices not so loud (both figuratively and literally). They step out of the hustle and bustle of society, and it's all too easy to let them slip from our daily focus as we continue with our super busy lives.

I have the honor and privilege of, despite being in my "middish" 30s, having four living grandparents. I'm the only person I know, among my contemporaries, with this distinction. And it's an understatement to say that it is not easy to get old. My grandparents range in age from 85 to 103. They have varying types and degrees of infirmities and challenges, and it's only through the love and dedication of my parents, the capability of their caregivers, and the result of astute planning on their part, that they are able to live comfortably and safely. I only see and hear about a very small fraction of what it takes to care for them. It's my parents and the staff at their assisted living facilities who are in the trenches. And my grandparents go on, bravely and with smiles, despite declining health and clouding of memory.

That's why it's so important to remember who they are, and who they were.

Here's a picture of my maternal grandpa ("Tat") receiving an acknowledgement from the state senator's office on Veteran's Day.

It's a very bittersweet photo. My grandpa, who suffers from Parkinson's, wanted so much to stand up so many times during this ceremony, but he can no longer do that safely. He was given recognition for his time in the Navy during WWII, and he was very moved. His time in the Navy was only the beginning of a lifetime of service, from Deputy Sheriff, to Captain of the Sheriff's Department, to mayor of our city, to beloved volunteer in the community. What I love about this picture is my mom's hand on his shoulder. It says everything.

On Thanksgiving, we opted to have our meal at my paternal grandparents' assisted living home, as it's not easy for them to leave the facility. Here is a picture of the family together:

I love that my grandparents are smiling in this picture, though sometimes it must be so hard to want to do that. I brag to everyone I know that my grandma (yes, she's my step-grandma, but the only reason that makes any difference is that I'm not blessed with her amazing genes) is 103. She is, in fact, two months shy of 104. She is absolutely incredible, as being 103 is not for the faint of heart. I think only the best people in the world get to live past 100. What we love most about our Grandma Sam is that she still has a sense of humor, a sense of style, and...well...sense! She understands what's going on around her, communicates well, and cares about what's happening in her world and others' lives, too.

My grandpa is no spring chicken at 97, but when your wife is 103, you don't get as much attention as you deserve. Grandpa is a character with a capital C. And though he and my other grandfather were both Captains on the Sheriff's Department, you really couldn't find two more different guys. Somehow their kids wound up together. Probably because it was written in the stars, as anyone who knows my parents would tell you. For many years, a conversation with Grandpa Carl was being on the receiving end of a litany of facts, stories, and life experiences. While Grandpa doesn't really have the strength to do that anymore, we all remember his stories and the zest with which he's approached life and knowledge. I love this profile of him.

I don't have any recent pictures of my maternal grandma, but I can tell you that she still has a dazzling smile. And while her world has always been small, in comparison with my other grandparents, that's how she's wanted it. She's able to be quite content in her corner of it. And she still has one heck of a collection of African violets.

If we're lucky, we'll all get old. And, no, I suppose it's not always pretty. It takes strength. But I see in my grandparents the evidence of lives well-lived. And if you've achieved that, I suppose there's a peace even in the difficult and challenging times that occur in later life. And though they may no longer get the limelight, I hope my grandparents know that they'll always have my love and respect.

Fun for Fall

Up until this week, Evan hadn't missed a day of Fun for Fours preschool. But then the cold from you-know-where hit, and he was sidelined for most of the week. It made me realize just how big a part school is playing in his life. He wanted to go back to school more than anything, and he cried when I kept him at home.

Most of his mornings at school start out the same way, with playing in the park with his friends. We have to get to school early to drop off Nathan, but then we have 20 minutes to hang out before preschool starts. Luckily, the park is right next door. We just have to make sure we don't slosh through any puddles on the slides (that required a quick detour home for a wardrobe change one day).

Much of the day is a bit of a mystery to me, though I'm gradually learning what goes on while the morning minutes tick by. There's outdoor play on the kindergarten yard, snack time (in which Evan usually passes on carrots and apples), Teachers vs. Cubs and Boys vs. Girls (the cubs and the boys are usually the winners, from what I hear), daily assignments (line leader and flag helper are coveted positions), free play (I hear Evan loves to draw on the wipe boards), and lengthy discussions of patterns and syllables.

The class has gotten to go to Lombardi Ranch for a field trip...

...walk in the school Halloween parade...

...run in the Final Mile Challenge for the Santa Clarita Marathon...

...and the annual Rock N Jog (Evan was the fastest in his class!).

And don't forget about the firemen visiting!

The year is passing too fast. It's already closing in on winter break. But I know that Evan is soaking in every minute, while he soaks in those patterns and syllables. And it makes me grin knowing that when he starts kindergarten next year, he'll already have 23 friends waiting for him.

We are Family

Evan started preschool last month, and it's been such a busy time of lots of new things in his life: new schedules, new friends, new teachers, even new foods. For the most part, he loves school. He gets so excited when he gets to be a daily helper, such as "fish feeder" (feeding the fish in the aquarium), "flag helper" (holding the flag during the Pledge of Allegiance) and--his favorite--"line leader" (leading the line of kids to the play yard).

We've gotten a few art items home, and this one is quite a gem. While Nathan has been drawing up a storm for years, Evan hasn't been as interested in drawing other than scribbling. This was the first time I really saw him draw figures, and I love the insight into his personality, not to mention his artistic style.

Note that all of us have flat hair on top, super ginormous eyes, small limbs coming directly out of our heads (no bodies necessary), and smiles. We thought the depiction of Nathan was especially funny, since his slanted eyebrows make him look, well, mean and/or angry. Was that Evan's intention? Well, you can "draw" your own conclusions!

Fourteen Years

 
Last week Brendan and I celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary. Knowing that a Wednesday night is not exactly conducive to dates, we squeezed in both a movie ("Man of Steel"--violence, aliens, and 1990s actors!) and dinner (at Lucille's--sugar biscuits, rum punch, and BBQ!) the previous weekend.

Nathan presented us with a homemade card:

So proud of his spelling consciousness. ;-) An anniversary is always wonderful, no matter how you spell it!

And to fuel my succulent addiction, Brendan thoughtfully choose this delicious arrangement to give to me:

All my favorites in one cube! There are even donkey tails! Swoon!

I sure love good movies, sugar biscuits, and donkey tails, but the best part of an anniversary? Being married to this guy and seeing his boys grow up to be awesome kids...

Happy Anniversary, Honey! I love you. :)

Birthday Blitz

I think Nathan had a pretty great birthday, if I do say so myself. It was pretty much divided into four quarters. OK, I guess every day is divided into four quarters, but sometimes those quarters run into each other more than others.

For a while I've been taking a daily morning walk, unless extenuating circumstances prevent it (i.e., laziness). Both boys decided to join me yesterday, taking plenty of time to talk to snails and rolly pollies:

Nathan allowed me to indulge in some birthday photography. Isn't he delish?

After our walk, we had chocolate chip pancakes, which are just regular Bisquik pancakes with chocolate chips poured in. I don't think it will be possible to have pancakes any other way now.

After breakfast, I allowed the boys to watch a movie. They both agreed to Madagascar 3, which was a pleasant surprise. Not only is the movie funny (the mentally-challenged Italian sea lion voiced by Martin Short is enough to sit through it), but they actually agreed to watch the same movie. And they both liked it. It's a birthday miracle! No pictures of them watching the movie. You can, uh, kind of picture them sitting on the couch.

After lunch, we went to Jump 5150, which is an indoor trampoline park that all the cool kids love and occasionally get injured at. We had a "birthday playdate mini party thingy" with Nathan's best friends Abe, Cole A. and Jacob C. It was great that they were all able to come, in addition to Abe's siblings and Ben C. (Cole and Luke C. are on vacation). I smuggled in drinks, fruit snacks, and mini cupcakes, even though I don't, ahem, think I was technically supposed to do that. Nevertheless, after two hours everyone was sufficiently sweaty, exhausted, and uninjured.

In the evening, after Brendan got home from work, we headed to California Pizza Kitchen to indulge in some good eats. Nice choice, Nathan. The greatest thing about CPK, aside from the pizza of course, is their $1 sundaes on the kids' menu. We get them every time for the boys because, well, they're a dollar and they look like this!

Afterwards, we said hi to the Bridgeport ducks before heading home to open some presents. Nathan was excited to get books, origami stuff, and a kids' circuit board kit. We will do more celebrating with the rest of the family this weekend, when it will be the obligatory 100 degrees. It's good to stretch this birthday stuff out, you know?

Happy Eight Birthday to Nathan

                                                                                                                                           June 25, 2013

Dear Nathan,

After months of counting down to the “big day,” your eighth birthday is finally here! Many people have told me “I can’t believe he’s eight!” and sometimes I can’t believe it, either. But when I think about all the amazing adventures and experiences we’ve shared, I can believe it. And instead of missing the days when you looked like this…

I choose to cherish the growing boy you’ve become, the one whose smile still lights up my life:

If I think back to your past year, since turning seven, I can think of a lot of B’s: baseball, books, and Battle Monsters. You played Hart Pinto baseball in both the fall and the spring. In the spring, you got to be a on a team with your good buddies from school: Abe, Cole A. and Cole C. Daddy was the assistant coach, and I was team mom. Evan was the ever-present cheerleader. And while the White Sox may have won only one game, you always kept a winning attitude. You improved your batting and fielding skills, and you were often the team’s catcher. No matter what, you cheered on your teammates and had a smile on your face.

You’ve taken to reading with a passion this year. You’ve devoured the Wimpy Kid series, Captain Underpants, Geronimo Stilton, and the Origami Yoda books. Together we’re reading the Harry Potter books (we’re currently on book 2), which is a lot of fun for both of us. Your Lexile reading score at the end of the school year was 914, the second highest in your second grade class (that we know of!). You also excelled in math, too, working your way up to the multiplication tables. Frankly, you excelled at everything academic and were a conscientious citizen at school, too. The only thing we have to work on is your penmanship. :) Everything else was perfect on your report card!

One of your favorite activities is creating cartoons, comic books, stories, and “video games” from your own imagination. The Battle Monsters have been a recurring theme. I find drawings of them all over the house, always engaged is some sort of intriguing and complicated scenario. Right now you’re interested in origami, too. You love working with paper—drawing on it or creating things out of it.

We’re still waiting for your second front tooth to come in. You’ve had a space there for months! It should start coming in any day now. You’ve now lost six teeth over the course of the year. You’ve also grown two inches since you started second grade. It looks like it’s all in your long legs! You usually have a great appetite. You especially love foods like pizza, meatballs, tacos, omelets and burgers. I let you buy lunch at school every Wednesday this year since it was “cookie day.” You usually got a chicken sandwich with Ranch dressing, too.

Your teacher, Mrs. Dittbern, was very nice, and you enjoyed being in her class with your best friends Abe, Cole A., and Jacob C. For the better part of the year, I volunteered on Thursday mornings with reading groups. Every day your teacher rated you and your classmates on your behavior. You always got “great green” or a gold star each day. Your favorite things to do in school were math, computer lab, and science.

You love your little brother Evan, even when he’s a little difficult. You read him stories, play Transformers with him, and wrestle on the floor. He looks up to you, and I’m sure he always will.

Today we started your birthday with chocolate chip pancakes (I think that should be a tradition!) and a movie, Madagascar 3. Then we met your best buddies at Jump 5150 for some trampoline fun. Tonight we’re going to California Pizza Kitchen for some delicious dinner and sundaes. It’s been a perfect birthday so far!

I just want you to know that I love being your mom. I feel so lucky to have such a sweet boy to see growing up so fast. I’m also so very lucky to be a stay-at-home mom, who gets to be with you all the time…when you’re not at school making that brain even smarter.

My wish for my eight-year-old: to be healthy and happy; learn everything you possibly can; continue reading like crazy; be kind to your friends, family, and classmates; laugh a lot; and to find what makes your heart sing!

Daddy, Evan and I love you! Happy 8^th birthday!

Love,
Mommy

To Every Season

As any parent will tell you, the spring baseball season is a long, busy, dusty, windy, weather-beaten time of year. Nathan's spring Pinto season on the Chicago White Sox began with practices in January and just ended last weekend with the wrap party. Nathan had the good fortune (due to a little behind-the-scenes organizing) of having some of his best buddies on his team, not to mention Brendan as assistant coach, me as team mom, and Evan as head cheerleader.

The step up from Shetland to Pinto was a big one. The games had kids pitching, scorekeepers, and umpires. We saw Nathan make great strides throughout the season, learning an effective batting stance, becoming aware of the plays on the field, and being an often-utilized catcher for the team. But more than anything else, we're proud of his attitude and sportsmanship, which was always stellar.

I'm not going to lie. The games were tough, and the White Sox came close to winning many times. Alas, they only had one actual win, but it was a biggie, winning 7-1 against the Pirates in the middle of the season. But we celebrated like we had won the playoffs, going out for Habit Burgers after the game.

The best part of the season was, of course, being with friends like Abe and Cole...

...and family...

So as the sun sets on another season, we leave with fond memories of batting cages, Sunday practices in the park, wind storms, game balls, the White Sox Shuttle (our mini van), the crazy dugout, dust, Gatorade, sun in our eyes, and of never giving up--no matter what the scoreboard says.

Mother's Day

I'm not a fool. I know that even if you're a convicted felon or a monkey torturer your child's teacher will still have him make you a beautiful Mother's Day card. But it's sweet, and I still love it. Just thought I'd share the card Nathan came home with from school.

Here's the front, complete with beautiful handprint flower:

Here's the inside:

Say it with me: "Awwww....." And I do make a dang fine baked potato. Here are some Hex Bugs, kid. Enjoy.

Here's another one, with a little encouragement from Dad, I suppose:

In order to introduce Nathan to non-poop-and-fart-centric reading material, I offered to start reading Harry Potter with him. Since it's a large, unillustrated tome, he was a little wary of reading it on his own. Fortunately, my scheme worked, and he absolutely loves it. I'm enjoying it, too.

And lest we forget Evan.........

 

Yep, I'm lucky. 

Letter to Evan

This is a letter I wrote to Evan the day before he turned four. I figured it was better to let it live here than get lost and collect digital dust on the computer. Now that I know I can have all my blog posts made into a book, well, my desire to articulate and chronicle our lives takes on new zest and enthusiasm...at least until the next season of Gypsy Wives, Ghost Adventures or American Horror Story returns to TV. Thank you very much.

                                                                                                            March 25, 2013

Dear Evan,

            I have a few minutes to sit down and write you a letter on the eve of your fourth birthday, since you’re taking a very rare nap (it must have been those three times you ended up in our bed last night!). But it’s a well-timed nap, because I don’t want your birthday to go by without reminding you what a fun and eventful year it was.

            First of all, you are very ready to be four! You’ve been looking forward to your birthday for months, and nothing short of an on-the-day celebration would do, so tomorrow we’re planning a small party with our family and close friends and Lamppost Pizza, to enjoy your two favorite food groups: pizza and chocolate cake. The loose theme will be Transformers, since that is your interest of the moment. You and Nathan enjoy playing with Transformers and pretending to be Transformers for hours on end.

            Four years ago today, I took Nathan on a “last-day-of-being-an-only-child” outing to the duck pond near Bridgeport (someplace you also enjoy) and to have a frozen yogurt treat (also something you love to do). I still remember that day well. I wore a bright pink maternity top and waddled around in a state of disbelieving excitement that we would be welcoming you into our family in less than 24 hours. I had no idea what adventures would be in store for us over the next four years.

            One thing anyone will say about you, Evan, is that you’re full of life and enthusiasm. You have no shortage of activities in your life, including your Mighty Mites class at My Gym and Terrific Tots preschool class at Valencia Glen Park. You look forward to both activities with joy, and they never get old. You’re especially good at the physical activities presented in My Gym, and you climb on just about everything possible each time we go. At school (which you pronounce “skew-ell”), you are good at listening to Ms. Diane and Ms. Lindsay, and you love snack time and outdoor play.

            This school year you’ve had a weekly playdate with your friends Ben and Luke Clendening, who come over while their mom Wendy volunteers at Mountainview. It’s been a fun get-together to look forward to, and it’s definitely been a lesson in patience and sharing! You also really love to go over to their house, too, as it’s like Disneyland with all the toys and fun things going on. You have absolutely no trouble leaving my side, which is another reason I’m comfortable with your starting “real” preschool next year. You’ve been accepted into Fun for Fours at Mountainview, and you’re counting down the days until you begin in August. You’re so excited that you’ll be going to the same school as Nathan, though you don’t quite understand that you won’t be in the same class.

            Nathan has been involved with baseball for almost four years now. Although you have yet to start an organized sport, you’ve been a routine cheerleader on the sidelines, though most of the time you’d rather play with your Hot Wheels or run around pretending to be a Transformer or Star Wars character.

            This year you got to make three very exciting trips. We went to Legoland last spring to celebrate your third birthday. You enjoyed it thoroughly, and it was your first amusement park trip. In the summer, you went on your first trip to Las Vegas. We stayed at the Sunset Station casino for a few nights, and you enjoyed splashing in the pool, bowling, and jumping on the bed. You even got to have a sleepover with Aunt Kack and Aunt Joene and enjoy their pool, too. And, lastly, in January, you finally got to go to Disneyland and California Adventure! We spent three busy days in the park. You loved going in Tarzan’s tree house, running around on Pirate’s Cove Island, and riding the roller coaster in Mickey’s Toon Town. Even Pirates of the Caribbean didn’t scare you.

            Hearing you talk is something that we all enjoy, Evan. You’re too cute with your intense, wide-eyed enthusiastic speech. We love the fact that there are a few words and phrases that you still don’t have down quite right. My favorite is “acapocker” for “helicopter.” And although you speak very well and clearly, you have a slight lisp and haven’t quite figured out that boys are “he” and girls are “she.” These little things are endearing, and it will actually be sad to see them go.

            Your little legs and arms are growing, and you love to snack all day long. You weigh about 32 pounds, and you love to sit in a big-boy seat in the car (a high-backed booster). Thanks to watching your brother and dad on the computer, you are a master of the keyboard and mouse, and you enjoy playing computer games…when I or Daddy let you!

            We’re looking forward to seeing your happy face tomorrow at your birthday party. All your special friends and family will be there. And although it’s a little sad to say goodbye to age three, you’re ready to make that step into another fun year, and I can’t wait to see what it will have in store for you.

            With lots of love always…

            

            Mommy

Two Inches and Two Pounds

I started this post last month, but life got in the way... But here I go again: last month was Evan's 4-year check up at the doctor's. Every time I schlep the boys to the doctor with their little yellow immunization cards in tow, I think back to all those well-baby and toddler check-ups we did when they were little. The numbers, the percentiles, the doctor's affirmations that they're "healthy" and "normal"--they meant so much. Well, with nearly eight years of doctors' visits under our belt, the check-ups don't hold the same weight and meaning they once did.

I'm lucky that I have a healthy kid, and except for an unexpected trip to urgent care to deal with a cut eyebrow, he hasn't been to the doctor since his last check-up at age three. I still had a post-it note on his immunization card from last time (exactly one year and one day earlier). Turns out he gained exactly two pounds and exactly two inches in that year and a day. He's still a little guy, but aside from some flat feet and a tendency to put his hands down his undies (which the doctor noticed), he's doing just fine.

Two inches and two years include so many memories. Evan is full of...it. Whatever "it" is. Life, tenacity, humor, anger, and a healthy dose of the cute. It's not always easy being the little brother, being lugged around to school drop-offs and pick-ups, baseball games, and those chores that Nathan gets to miss out on when he's in school (Costco hot dogs are a great bribery tool).

But fortunately Evan and I get to experience a lot of the world together, and he gets his own special activities, too. He's spent this past "school year" attending Terrific Tots through the city's recreation program. It's like "preschool light." I volunteer once or twice a month, but otherwise he's on his own with his two teachers and nearly 17 classmates for two hours each Tuesday and Thursday. He likes school, but admitted to me that he prefers it when I stay. He's met some kindred spirits there, including the precocious Tristan and the winsome Emme. And he loves to tell on Lucas, who has a penchant for throwing sand and tantrums. The teachers always give him good reports, though.

Evan has continued to go to My Gym every Friday. He's been going for nearly two years now, and he never tires of the running, jumping, hanging, tumbling, dancing, and balancing. After this summer, we'll say goodbye to My Gym, which will be much more bitter than sweet. He'll be aging out of the kids' gym classes, and he'll, of course, be spending a lot more time at school come August, when he'll start daily preschool at our elementary school's Fun for Fours program. No, I'm not ready for it. I'm sort of in denial about it happening at all.

Despite Evan's "kid" status overtaking his "toddler" status this past year, I still hold onto the small things that remind me that he's still, sort of, in a teensy weensy way, my baby. His mispronunciations and malapropisms are priceless ("acapocker" for "helicopter," "apprend" for "pretend," and the ever popular "dark times" for "night"). It's even still cute when he drops his pants to pee in the grass. Sort of.

Naps are fewer and farther between, and they wreak havoc on bedtime when they occur. But sometimes, you just have to give in. It's exhausting being Evan.

Evan doesn't suffer fools. He doesn't suffer...well...anyone who stands in the way of what he wants, which is often a snack, a TV show (anything Transformers is a favorite right now), a very specific toy, a computer game, or a pass from washing his hands. No doubt this tenacity will carry him far in life--hopefully, however, not into the principal's office. Right now his cuteness seems to soften the blows (sometimes literally) of his stubbornness.

Evan's playmates often include our neighbors Ben and Luke. They've enjoyed lots of play-doh, board games, rounds of hide and seek, Star Wars scenarios, snacks, and the occasional scuffle. They, too, are younger brothers!

But no matter what, Evan has a sweetness that can't be denied. When his Papa was feeling under the weather, he said several times that he hopes he feels better. He offers random "I love yous" and hugs, even to the tolerant-up-to-a-point cat, Logan. He often sneaks into our bed early in the morning, something Nathan never did. And he just pretty much makes everyone laugh, sometimes with odd faces and nudity, sometimes without.

As we head into year four, I know it will be another memorable, and no doubt momentous, one. While I want to hold onto the last "baby bits" that I can, I know that Evan is charging full-steam ahead into the kid zone. And I look forward to being his referee, chauffeur, chef, laundress, playmate, sometimes-teacher, but always, his loving mom.